Diffuse the situation. Reduce the tension in the relationship. Find out what is causing the dark clouds. It could be anger, frustration or disappointment. It could be jealousy or insecurity. It could be a misunderstanding or a misinterpretation of your actions or of the circumstances.
Fix it by soliciting the other person’s viewpoint and explaining your viewpoint. Be ready and willing to change your behavior. Ask them to change their behavior, at least slightly. Set new boundaries for acceptable behavior. A major storm with damaging hail and high winds can and should be avoided. Don’t become battered and tossed around. Don’t let them be battered as well. This won’t accomplish anything and may actually make things worse. If you cannot fix it then consider curtailing your exposure and your vulnerability. Do everything you can to reduce the probability of a storm erupting.
Relationships that are on again and off again are exhausting. Eventually, they drain your life blood and eliminate the joy from your life.
Patricia Frank is a Licensed Psychotherapist. She can be reached at 305-788-4864.
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